Pygmy visits the Castle of Chaos!

Greetings from Branson, MO, the hotspot for tacky shows and attractions for tacky tourists, including myself. I decided to head out here to see what all the hub-bub was about, and through the midst of all these shows all over the place, I stumble upon this entertainment complex that features a castle and King Kong on the top of a tall building. Besides driving by half of a sunken ship, this thing was the coolest thing we drove by while on the way to our hotel.

 If you don't know what the Castle of Chaos is, check out their very own website. Here's what's featured on their site that drew me in to want to check it out even more:

Castle of Chaos is the first-ever 5D interactive haunted experience in the world. No kidding! This action-packed adventure merges a state-of-the-art 3D horror film with heart-pounding motion, special effects, animatronics and an all-out shooting battle against evil. Top five participants from each round are shown on the screen with their scores.

According to the International Association of Amusement Parks and Attractions, "This is the first haunted ride in the world to combine so many multi-media elements and technologies in one attraction. The result is a first-class scare!"

IAAPA approved usually means Pygmy approved, so now this is a must do! So we get back in the car and drive back here and get our tickets and wait in line for the next ride experience. As we're waiting in line, they have a monitor showing you late breaking news about the Castle and how it's haunted etc etc, the preshow if you will. Anyways, it was hard to hear it since it was turned down, and the fact that the walls were pretty thin between the ride and the line that we heard the ride more than anything! This was annoying for a little bit, but really pumped me up for it because soon we'll be going in for a spin, and if it's that loud it must be good, right? Loud is good? Well, not necessarily. Miley Cyrus sings loud, doesn't mean she's good, and the same can be said about Castle of Chaos unfortunately.

We enter the show room and see this platform of 25 chairs on a turntable and we strap in, put on our glasses, grab our guns, and we're ready to go! It starts to spin, and stops in front of a screen with lackluster 3D effects. Ok, maybe it'll get better and scarier. Nope. We spin around and land on another screen, and we start shooting things. Ok, what are we shooting at now? There's 2 monsters and the screen and that's it. So we sit here for about a minute shooting at 2 monsters that barely react to your shots? I guess that's acceptable if their zombies and already dead, right? I hope so. We spin around several more times landing on other screens. What I thought was funny was how we'd spin around and land on the same screen once, or to the screen directly next to where we just left. The attraction has other special effects such as leg ticklers, air bursts, Stitch's chili breath, fog, and did I mention it spins? It was a fun but really a big let down. I usually don't have high expectations for things because I hate being disappointed, but with all the ads about this place, who wouldn't have high expectations? What really killed the ride experience for me was the way they executed the storyline in the attraction itself. It did have a nice storyline that did seem promising, but during the ride it went sour. This just goes to show you that if your story doesn't work, no matter how many groundbreaking special effects, it'll turn out to seem like a waste of money like this place was. I'm glad I've gone through it and experienced it and had fun, but this is one of those attractions where once is more than enough.

Sketches with passing other boats?

Are there any sketches you do with other skippers on boats passsing?

The only place were boats 'pass' by is by Schwietzer Falls, and no, we don't have any sketches we do as we pass, because even though you can see the other boat, we're technically in two different show scenes and two different parts of the spiel and they both don't have time for "Hey, look at the weirdo in khaki in that boat over there, feel sorry for the people on that boat." However, there are some things several skippers do with other boats during backups by Chief Namee, such as getting your boat to say "Hi other boat" on the count of three, 1 . . . 2 . . . 3! "HI OTHER BOAT!" and then 7 seconds later, have the other boat reply back with some witty comment, and it could go on back and forth for hours. There has been one time we've done 'the wave' like you would do at a sports stadium, starting from the front of the first boat in the backup and going as far down as possible, hopefully onward to the next boat, and so on.

Keep those questions coming, comment below if you'd like your question answered here in my blog!

Have I always been in B mode?

One thing I love about the jungle of interwebs, is there's a lot of entertaining things out there, and I just so happened to find this one incredibly large furry guy that lives atop a really big mountain that also shares my love of disco.

So after reading the sad story of this gentle giant and all he wanted to do was eat unsuspecting tourists (another similarity!), he pulled his back out and is frozen in time and blinded by a strobe light. How sad. I haven't been flashed like that before, and it's only a matter of time they add strobe lights and other sound effects to make me look even scarier. Would anyone know was I supposed to have thrown my spears at the boats, or act like I was about to throw it by moving my arms? As far as I know, I've been standing here going "ooga booga boo". My question to you, whoever still reads these crazy blog postings of mine, have I always been in B mode all this time? Also, what other things have you've noticed that are also stuck in B mode, like my new found friend, the yeti? Please for the love of monkey buddha comment below! That is all.

Jungle Cruse, update or scrap?

Do you think the majority of your passengers love the JC or view it as a relic that needs to be updated or gone?

It feels like people come on here because 'they have to, they've always done a cruise in the jungle every visit and need to do it while they're here now' and then afterwards come off wondering 'why did we even bother with it?' Or if they had a great skip "That's why we keep coming back, he/she was great!" I do think it needs to be updated, because the ride by itself without our corny jokes, the ride is just as boring as sitting on 'small world,' honestly. I've had a couple trips around where it was just me just to keep the boats cycling, so I'd sit and run the boat, and even though I get a little break from spieling, it does it a bit boring going through there and I'd think "we'd be doomed if they got rid of us and automated the boats" and gives me more reason to step up my spiel to try to bring some life into what looks like a dying attraction.

Have a question about me, the Jungle, my opinions on anything you have in mind (within reason) feel free to ask me and it just might end up getting answered here in my nearly dead blog, lucky you! So don't delay, ask away!